HeatMarie

Brittney came into the apartment as I finished blow drying my hair. Hearing her voice through the closed bathroom door made me grateful for the cold shower, a gallon of water, and the couple of Advil that took away my throbbing headache. I love the woman, without a doubt, but damn if her voice doesn’t carry for miles. And the likelihood of her staying silent for over five minutes has about the same chance as an icicle stick being used for torture in hell. Probable, under the right circumstances, but highly unlikely. 

The moment I walked out of the bathroom she screamed, “Happy Birthday!”, while running up to me like she hadn’t seen me in years, even though it was only three days before that we had our last girls’ night. 

She grabbed my arms and sat me down on the couch and stared at me with a serious look on her face, trying to hide her mischievous smile.

“So, who was the guy on the trail?” she prodded.

“What? Who told you?” My defenses shot up and Brittney just smiled.

“But when? You just got here?”

Scanning the room, my glare drifted from Brittney to Alex and Dustin, who lounged on the couch with beers in hand. Dustin offered a nonchalant shrug and Alex avoided me completely. The first fueled my rage and the second lit it on fire. I should have known one of them would blab. “I told you both I don’t know him.” I said, crossing my arms and slouching back on the couch, “This is so unfair!” 

 My words didn’t matter. It’s only my guess that while I was in the shower, they messaged her, telling her of the mysterious man hovering over me when they found me on the trail. And like always, when the boys thought something was suspicious, they brought in their last defense. They knew she would make me spill all the deep, dark secrets I was hiding from them. In fairness, Brittney had the power that would make anyone tell their darkest desires, every hiding place they had ever been, and if she started in those secrets you promised to take to the grave, they would erupt, no more secrets. 

Brittney’s playful voice reached out to me as she delicately grasped my chin and redirected my attention back to her. “Nope, you’re going to tell me, who was he?” Her eyes danced as she waited for my reply. 

My hands fidgeted and I stumbled over my words. “I really have no idea who he was. I only got his name.” 

“Which was?” 

“Warren,” and the subtle blush on my cheeks betrayed me before she even asked. 

“That cute, huh? What did he look like?” Brittney’s smile widened. 

Dustin leaned forward, resting his arms on his knees. “Are you looking for a new boyfriend?” 

“Perhaps,” Brittney said coyly, her lips curling into a sinful smile as she winked at him. “A girl really can’t have too many.” Dustin laughed as he rolled his eyes and sat back on the couch.

“So tell me,” she repeated. Her persistence is something to be loathed and admired in equal measure. It really just came down to what side of the table you sat at. Dustin and Alex were on the side of a theatrical piece. But for me, I was in the spotlight, with Brittney digging her coffin nails into my mind and loathing came easy. Her eyes followed mine, noting them lingering in Alex’s direction. It was really no secret between any of us that I had a thing for him. It was never spoken, of course, but yet, everyone knew. I told myself I would never actually try to date him. He was Dustin’s friend, after all. Then again, Brittney was mine, and Dustin had no problems taking her to bed. 

“Oh, no you don’t. Eyes back over here,” Brittney snapped her fingers in front of my face. “You, my doll, my beautiful Haley Lynn, are a young, attractive woman, who happens to be very single. And I’m talking about the sad kind of single, the kind that’s been sitting on the clearance rack for far too long. Now, tell your bestest friend in all the lands… Was he cute?” 

Alex shifted on the couch and took a long gulp from the bottle. He spent a lot of time with us lately, but Brittney’s no nonsense personality had its way of affecting the entire room. It might be a theatrical masterpiece, yes. But even the audience at times was forced to get uncomfortable. More so, when the person being tortured is holding onto a few of your dirty little tales, you instantly realize you’re in more of the game than you previously thought. And all you can do is hope that the sweat beading down their forehead makes them forget every last one you ever told them. 

But oh, Brittney’s brutal honesty had its way of forcing the words right from my lips, hoping it would remove a bit of the sting. “He was cute, dark hair, pale blue eyes.” 

“I know that face. Too bad you didn’t get more than just his name.” She said as she patted my cheek and stood up. “Now, why are we sitting around like a bunch of losers? There is a birthday to celebrate! Shots before dinner!” She walked over to the kitchen counter. I didn’t realize she brought the whole damn liquor store.  Ten different bottles lined the counter next to my single bottles of wine and whiskey. 

“None for me, thank you.” Her stare bore right into me, burning a hole somewhere between my eyes. There would be no resisting Brittney, none, none at all. Her eyes spoke for her voice, “Yeah girl, you’re not talking your way out of this one. We are ride or die.” And we were about to ride, and if I didn’t resist, I would die in the morning. “I can’t, seriously.” I insisted, a bit too weakly. 

“Why not!” she whined.

“I’m really not feeling like it. You guys are more than welcome to celebrate. I’ll be right here, wrapped up in a nice warm blanket with a movie.” 

“What movie?” Alex asked. I shrugged. I had no idea. Honestly, I doubted there would even be a movie. Sleep sounded just fine, or a book that would take my mind off of just about everything. All I knew was going out was not the plan.

It wasn’t just my birthday after all. It was also Angel’s. Bitterness still lingered from when she had told me she was going to spend the night with Frank. After three good years of birthdays together, she went right back to how things were.  So this year, Alex got nominated by Dustin to take her place. 

“No! We have to go out!” Brittney cried.

“Seriously, I just don’t want to celebrate. Go! Have fun!” 

“Hal, is this about Frank?” Dustin’s question lingered in the room that became completely quiet. Too quiet. That awkward kind where you just want to scream or make a funny face just to hear a sound. I shook my head, but even they saw the tears starting to form in my eyes. I looked down at the ground, trying to focus on the small little grooves on the hardwood floor. Their stares hit with an intensity that forced the tears to fall. God, how I wanted them to look away, just for a moment. For heaven’s sake, let a woman compose herself. But they didn’t. They wouldn’t. It made the inside of me cringe. 

“I get it. It’s hard, and it’s frustrating.” Dustin said. “He should have done way more than six years. Everyone in this room agrees.” 

“Six years Dustin, that’s all my life is worth. Six fucking years.” The words seeped out. I couldn’t have stopped them if I wanted to. It’s like they were hanging on to the tip of my tongue waiting for the right moment. I tried to fight back the choking in my voice. I tried to say them with anger. I couldn’t even manage that. The words were weak and flooded with self pity.

“You can’t let him control your life any more, Hal, he’s not worth it. And you, not celebrating your birthday, he wins. Don’t give him that.” Dustin said.

“I’m not!”

Brittney took a little dropper from a bottle and counted out drops in four little shot glasses. “Then prove it. Let us celebrate!”

“I have work tomorrow.” I said, as I wiped the tears from my cheeks. 

Brittney turned back from the counter, “But aren’t the Holland’s moving. I thought yesterday was your last day with those little brats.” 

“They aren’t brats.” I said.

She unscrewed the lid to a bottle of kinky. “You’re kidding me, right? Kolby was pure evil. How many times did you come home with a black eye because he threw a toy at you?” She gave the shot glasses a quick pour and opened another bottle.

“Only once.” 

“Point proven, brats!” She finished making the drinks and handed the first two to Alex and Dustin, who took them without reluctance. Then she held a shot glass out to me.

  “Brittney…” I said as she held out the glass. The two of us went into a standoff as we glared at each other. I wanted so badly for Brittney to be the one to break. But I did mention her reluctance, didn’t I? The damn woman refused to move until I finally took the glass, which I did with dramatic reluctance, rolling my eyes and sighing, “Fine!”

“We have three things to celebrate,” Brittney said. “Your birthday, no more brats, and a new job.” We all stood around the small coffee table, tapped the glasses together, tapped them down on the table, and then I choked on the fiery liquid that scorched my throat all the way down to my stomach. 

“Jesus Brittney, what was that?” Alex asked, his eyes watering from the intensity.

“The Brittney Special.” she said. Dustin and I moaned.

After my throat quit burning and my stomach stopped running from the devil I just poured into my body, I turned to Dustin, “We should have asked first,” I said. Dustin nodded in agreement. We really should have known. The Brittney special was the drink she only served on special occasions, and to this day, no one knows what is in the Brittney special.  At least not all ingredients. But the taste matched her strong, bold, adventurous personality, best in small doses, otherwise you’re likely to find yourself in some kind of trouble. 

“What is a Brittney special?” Alex’s nervousness made us laugh.  Brittney pretended not to hear him.

“So, Hal, why didn’t you tell us you got a new job?” Dustin asked. 

“Because you weren’t trying to get me drunk?”

“So what is it?” Brittney asked.

“What’s what?” I grabbed the glasses and brought them back to the kitchen and laid them in the sink.

“The new job! Don’t leave me guessing. I’m sure as long as you don’t tell me more brats, I’ll be happy for you.” Brittney said. I felt my cheeks grow red.

“More kids? Seriously?” 

I shook my head. “No, it’s not a nanny job.” 

“So what?”

“Archaic Wisdom,” I told them in a quick rushed voice, hoping they would dismiss it. I watched Brittney’s mouth drop to the floor. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t hear that right.” 

I laughed, “This is why I don’t tell you anything.” 

“Haley, you do know it’s a…” she snapped her fingers, trying to summon the answer, “what do they call it?” 

“Spiritual Bookstore,” Alex said, taking a sip of his beer just to avoid her gaze. 

“Okay, I wasn’t expecting that from you.” She said, pointing to Alex. “Boy, you are full of surprises. Don’t worry, we’ll come back to that.” She turned back to me. 

“So you believe in all the witchy stuff now?” 

“No, they have books. I like books.” 

“Uh-huh. Well, at least it’s not spit puking, toy throwing brats, and we can all be thankful for that. Now who wants dinner?” 

We headed downtown to Magdolines. A small Italian restaurant, where the drinks are wonderfully strong and the garlic cheese bread is to die for.  

The scent of garlic, fresh bread and basil was a pure heaven that made my stomach grumble, reminding me just how hungry I was. The waiter walked us by the tables that held small, little flickering flames. Their lights cast tiny shadows on the table’s polished surface that enhanced the soft earth tones of walls, the elegant decor, and the wooden beams criss-crossing along the ceiling. It was a lively evening there that night, with plenty of murmuring conversations and laughter as people mingled and clinked their glasses in toasts and celebrations. 

The waiter opened the door to the small balcony and sat us along the edge that looked out over the river. “How did you manage to get us this, Dustin?” I asked. Seats overlooking the river, with its serene waters glistening under the setting sun and reflecting its vibrant colors, were always booked out months, if not years, in advance. 

“I might have pulled in a few favors and made reservations about a year ago,” he said with a grin. I gave him a hug and thanked him, grateful that they had forced me out of the apartment. I wouldn’t have wanted to miss this. The sun softly setting over the river, the fragrance of summer starting to weave its way through the lingering last breaths of spring, and there I was, sharing a moment with the most amazing people.

The waiter took our order with a warm smile, just another piece adding to the ambiance. He returned promptly with our drinks–crisp red wine for me, Alex and Dustin and a sparkling cocktail for Brittney. And I mean, it had sparkles in it. Gold dusted sparkles. We clicked our glasses as they wished me Happy Birthday once again. I took the first sip and gazed out at the breathtaking view. It didn’t take long for the waiter to come back with our food, which somehow tasted better than I remembered. Everything felt so right, it felt more than that, it felt perfect. 

“You have got to be kidding me.” Brittney said, staring at the door behind me. I didn’t even get to turn around before I heard his voice. “It’s our special little girl’s birthday today.” 

“Dad, you’re embarrassing me.” I turned and saw Angel smiling, laughing and enjoying the attention Frank was giving her as he pulled her in for a side hug. 

“Well, there goes my appetite.” Pushing away my plate, I grabbed my drink in its place. I really needed something stronger than the red wine, but I knew better. I took a gulp while reminding myself that there was no way I was going to start my new job hung over, all because the bastard and his daughter decided to make an appearance. Finishing the thought, I looked down at the glass, now empty, minus the smallest drop resting at the bottom. 

“I will gladly tell them to leave,” Brittney said. Oh, how I love her furiousness. Only on three occasions did her lack of a filter get us into trouble. Dustin gently pressed his hand against her arm and said, “Brittney, we are not going to make a scene.”

“You know, and I know, and she knows, and hell, even Alex probably knows, that he called around to every restaurant asking if any of us had made reservations.” Dustin gave her the look that told her to just stop.

“So that’s Frank, I take it.” Alex said. I nodded. “Don’t you have a restraining order against him?” I nodded again. “I don’t mind telling him to leave. And then arresting him when he refuses.” 

I heard the conversation going on around the table. But I saw Frank’s hands wrapped around my neck more clearly. I could feel the pain of his boots pressing me into the ground and the terror in the moments before I wished for my own death. My mouth became dry and no matter how hard I tried to swallow it was like my throat was swollen shut.

“Oh, I love having a big, strong man with a badge at our table. You should just start by arresting him. Skip the small talk.” Brittney said.

“Brittney,” Dustin said again. And I heard them all laugh. I wanted to join them in the moment, but I couldn’t escape my memories. 

Frank, Lisa, Johnny and Angel were ushered past our table. Frank and Lisa never looked in our direction, but I never glanced in theirs either. I only watched them out of the corner of my eye. As Johnny walked by, he stopped. “Look, it’s the bitch who ruined the family.” And I finally looked up.

“I’m sorry,” Angel lipped as she tried to push him forward. I gave a small smile, basically telling her I knew it wasn’t her fault. 

I sighed and tried not to blame the little monster. He was only nine, and at this point, he did spend over half his life with his father locked away in a cell because of me. No doubt it crossed my mind that he heard those words from Frank, and that is when I noticed the old man’s stare, a sly smirk on his face. 

“Johnny, we’ve talked about this. You shouldn’t use those kinds of words.” Dustin said.

“You’re not my dad, and dad is home now, so I don’t have to listen to you.” Dustin rolled his eyes, and Angel tried to pull little Johnny away. I still called him little Johnny even though at 9 he was almost five feet tall and weighing about 150lbs. 

My eyes darted back to Johnny and there I saw the three year old, jumping around laughing, acting like a wrestler as Frank beat the life out of me. All the tears that wanted to fall just a moment before vanished. My body and mind went on lock down, not in a way like a deer in highlights. No, that would have been a better place. My mind went to a place that was dark, evil, and emotionless. My jaw locked, and I felt my lip turn up in a snarl. The look gave out every ounce of hate and disgust I felt. “You’re nothing but wasted space, a filthy, smelly, spoiled brat, with no friends, and I see why. Pathetic doesn’t even begin to cover it. So tell me, why should I give a damn what you think?” Everyone turned to watch me and Johnny’s eyes welled with tears. Angel finally pulled him away and went to their table. I shook my head and brought my mind back. 

And it was weird. I looked around the table and noticed their stunned expressions, with their mouths slightly agape. “What?” I asked. 

“Haley, that wasn’t like you,” Dustin said.  I took a deep breath and looked down at my plate. It wasn’t. Very few times in my life had I lost my temper like that. In fact, the last time was when I punched Angel. Six years ago. So, it was very out of character for me. I blamed it on the drinks and watched Johnny and Angel sit down as Frank eyed me. He sat at the far end of their table, a position that ensured he could keep his eyes on me the entire time.

I looked down at the plate in front of me. Even as people talked, I didn’t risk the chance of looking up. I felt his cold, hard eyes watching my every move. Even as he laughed and talked loud enough for the entire place to hear him, I felt his eyes and the thought that came with it, “Once I get my hands on you, girl…”

While Dustin and Brittney were making their own small talk, Alex leaned in and whispered, “Haley, are you okay?” 

“Of course I am,” I replied. His hand came to touch mine, and I cringed and jerked it away. He watched my eyes as they glanced quickly up at Frank, then back down at the table.

  “I thought so.” He said. And then he got up, pulled his badge from his back pocket and walked around to stand right behind Frank. He held his badge out, spoke softly into Frank’s ear, made a few hand gestures, then came back and sat down. We all watched as Frank gave one last glare and switched places with Lisa, whose back was to me the entire time. 

“I don’t like people staring. It’s rude.” Alex said, plopping a piece of garlic bread into his mouth. I shook my head and smiled. Brittney was right and she knew it when she saw my smile and gave a subtle nudge, leaned in and whispered in my ear, “See, like I said, It’s nice having a big, strong man with a badge around. Did you see him flex his muscles over there? So hot.” 

“Brittney, we can all hear you.” Dustin said.

“Yeah, and?” The way Alex’s cheeks turned red broadened my smile. It pushed out all the bad thoughts as I thought how adorable it was for a man like him to blush. It also made me very proud of Brittney for not commenting on it. The poor man was embarrassed enough.